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It Goes Ding When There's Shark Aids

I am the Moose Whisperer. I'm 23 and I love cats, TV shows, video games, and this guy named Mike. Spoiler Alert: this tumblr contains bloggery and re-bloggery.
Apr 1 '14

adventuresofmoosehead:

Caught playing the PS4 again……

Mar 18 '14
The Doctor's catchphrases 
(and an obligatory new addition)

(Source: frederickschilton)

Mar 18 '14

(Source: shephaestion)

Mar 18 '14

crateshya:

darknephilim:

thesickestjokes:

Turquoise is the best colour in the world.

It’s cyantifically proven.

you fucking didnt

COLOR

PUNS

Mar 18 '14
"What if all women were bigger and stronger than you? And thought they were smarter? What if women were the ones who started wars? What if too many of your friends had been raped by women wielding giant dildos and no K-Y Jelly? What if the state trooper who pulled you over on the New Jersey Turnpike was a woman and carried a gun? What if the ability to menstruate was the prerequisite for most high-paying jobs? What if your attractiveness to women depended on the size of your penis? What if every time women saw you they’d hoot and make jerking motions with their hands? What if women were always making jokes about how ugly penises are and how bad sperm tastes? What if you had to explain what’s wrong with your car to big sweaty women with greasy hands who stared at your crotch in a garage where you are surrounded by posters of naked men with hard-ons? What if men’s magazines featured cover photos of 14-year-old boys with socks tucked into the front of their jeans and articles like: “How to tell if your wife is unfaithful” or “What your doctor won’t tell you about your prostate” or “The truth about impotence”? What if the doctor who examined your prostate was a woman and called you “Honey”? What if you had to inhale your boss’ stale cigar breath as she insisted that sleeping with her was part of the job? What if you couldn’t get away because the company dress code required you wear shoes designed to keep you from running? And what if after all that women still wanted you to love them?"
For the Men Who Still Don’t Get It
by Carol Diehl  (via kittycollars)

(Source: coralfershoral)

Mar 17 '14

owlgoggles20:

the-real-professor-oak:

double0strider:

tennantstype40:

according to my art teacher i have a really aggressive drawing style????

use this to your advantage, kill the rest of your art class, paint with their blood, leave no survivors, use the change you wrangle from their pockets to buy mcnuggets.

come on guys let's get creative

I THOUGHT WE ALL AGREED

TO NEVER BE CREATIVE AGAIN

Mar 17 '14

toxicnebulae:

excuse me but that is a MADE-UP gender. the only REal genders are as follows:

  • lizard
  • robot
  • merperson
  • a strange buzzing noise
  • alien, I think
  • an insurmountable feeling of dread

you have to pick one. I’m sorry I don’t make the rules

Mar 17 '14
booksofadam:

LED lights. I might be getting carried away. #tinyhats4cats

booksofadam:

LED lights. I might be getting carried away. #tinyhats4cats

Mar 17 '14

sleep:

what a time to be alive

(Source: lolgifs.net)

Mar 17 '14

bunnywith:

jadedgalvanizer:

timelordsatan:

ambular-d:

pumpkinlessidjit:

i want there to be an angel that descends from the heavens only when someone is being stupid

and the angel just gently places their hand over the person’s mouth

and whispers in a voice filled with heavenly beauty and love

“no”

ANABIEL

LOOK IT UP

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NEW FAVORITE ANGEL

(Source: abaddonless)